The Hand You're Dealt

When I was growing up, I hated my name. It was different from everyone else’s and I used to get teased incessantly. I was called “Tangerine”, “Tangy” and my all time favorite, “Tangerinee-Weeney”! I wanted a more common name like “Jacqueline” or “Demetria” so that I could fit in and not stand out. Then I struggled with insecurities about having to wear glasses. I was kind of homely and my hair was nappy. As I became a teenager, I struggled with not having “good” hair, light skin or light brown eyes. I was skinny and my feet were big, and I began to seek approval in all the wrong ways. As an adult, I’ve questioned why I started losing my hair in my late twenties, why I struggled with infertility and most recently, why do I potentially have an eye disease that could threaten my vision in the future.

The list of ‘why’s’ can be endless. It’s in times when I’m feeling the most vulnerable that I have to rest on what I know verses what I feel. What I know is that God knew me before I was formed in my mother’s womb and that He has a definite and specific plan for my life. That plan can only be fulfilled by me in my unique, pre-designed way. I know that nothing that occurs in my life is a surprise to God. He has already pre-destined my path and I just need to walk in it with confidence and ease.

If I would have designed my life, it would have been a whole lot different, but not necessarily to my good. I think in life we can take a lesson from one of my favorite card games, spades. When the cards come around, you don’t know what you’re going to get, but a good player always knows how to make the most of the hand they’re dealt.

Last Week's Poll Results...

The question was: What’s the Best Way to Deal with Haters?

Sixty-Eight percent of you said that you would “feel flattered because if you weren’t doing anything spectacular, they wouldn’t be hatin’ on you in the first place.” The next runner up was to “pretend they dropped off the face of the earth”. One thing that I’ve learned is that as long as you’re doing something worth-wild, there will always be the Peanut Gallery trying to throw water on your flame. They’re full of criticism, comments and critiques, but none that are helpful. You have to get to a place where, yes, you ignore them, but also use their rhetoric as a clue that you are, indeed, doing yo’ thang, and One Monkey (or two or three) don’t stop the show!

Tune In and Tune Out

I love listening to music on my iPod. I like to crank up the volume and tune out my surroundings. When I’m jammin’, the world could be coming to an end, but I don’t hear it and I don’t care about it. Taking my earphones out of my ear becomes a reality check, so to speak. I, then, realize where I am and have to deal with the circumstances at hand.
When you’re on your path to Purpose, there are some skills you need to develop in order to get to your wealthy place. First, you have to tune in to positive vibes that will fuel your energy. That can be in the form of receiving instruction from a mentor, reading a good book, or being encouraged by your Boo. Those tools of motivation can help give you that boost you need to keep on keepin’ on. You also have to learn to tune out negativity. That negativity can come from some Hater on your job, a doubting family member or even the negative self-talk in your mind. Whatever the source, it’s got to go! Think about all the people that are at the place you’re trying to get to. No doubt they experienced some nay-sayers and player-haters along the way who were less than supportive of their efforts. What makes them so unique? They went for it despite the obstacles, despite the disappointments, despite the rejection and you can, too. In the meantime, learn to focus on that which will catapult you to success and pretend you’re listening to your iPod and practice the art of tuning in and tuning out.

Last Week's Poll Results...

The question was: You’re on your way to a job interview for your dream job. With 10 minutes to spare, you sit in the lobby waiting to be interviewed. You look down at your blouse & notice a big jelly stain from the chicken biscuit you ate earlier. Just as you were about to run to the bathroom to try to get the stain out, the interviewer calls you back…

Seventy-two percent of you said that you would ‘Put on your million-dollar smile and work that interview like your unemployment check depended on it’. AMEN to that! We all have imperfections that we have to work around, but nothing is more attractive than confidence. You’re on the right track, sistah, so keep workin' it out!